KEEPING THOSE HOPIUM PIPES BURNING

This one sent in by TimBo from Chicago. John Kass, who provided necessary insight into the Chicago Way when the Blagojevich story broke in late 2008, is suggesting that one year into the Obama administration, the soaring rhetoric of Hope has turned into a smidgeon of Hopium that Obama's teleprompter-writers are likely to hope gets smoked.

In his State of the Union address Wednesday night, Obama is expected to boast about freezing discretionary spending. Politically, this is a response to that Boston Tea Party that cost him his supermajority in the Senate. But he's freezing only a tiny fraction of the federal budget. And he's already spent us into the poorhouse.

The Republicans sneer that Obama speechifying about fiscal responsibility is like a fat man going on a diet after winning a pie-eating contest. But I remember the Republicans in full congressional power. You could identify them by all that sticky rhubarb filling running down their chins and jowls, and the crumbs from the crusts on their lapels.

So how can America prepare for Obama's newfound fiscal prudence?

Hopium.

Yes, Hopium, the stuff that numbs the nation, harvested from the lush green fros of the Happy Obama Chia Head and the Determined Obama Chia Head. Wednesday's speech calls for a special blend: 70 percent determined Obama and 25 percent Happy Obama. Let's fill the rest of the pipe with aromatic tobacco leaf from Turkey.

On Tuesday, the Congressional Budget Office buzz killers reported that the deficit smudged with Obama's fingerprints has risen to $1.35 trillion.

Read the whole thing as there is some interesting reading about some characters on the local Chicago scene that reminds us about how that Chicago way works.